(TW: transphobia, depressing real life stuff leading to gruesomeness)

Dear Mr Obvious Female Name,

To retain your benefits you must visit our assessment centre at 34 Crap House, Shit Town, England. You have been assigned a doctor who you have met once before and hated. Please bring this letter with you, along with your social security number and a scraping of skin from the back of your neck.

Your appointment is for 2PM on 31st February 202X. If you do not attend, your benefits will be cut with no further discussion. To regain your benefits, you will have to swim through a trench of human excrement six times, and then a further six times while doing the backstroke. In such an incident, some provisions will be made for wheelchair users.

Live, Laugh, Love,
The Social Security System Of Shit Town

P.S. Please also note that the main game file can be downloaded seperately, where it can be played in a text adventure interpreter for any modern computer. Look up "how to play interactive fiction" for more details.




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